Obedience and Honor

Exodus 20:12  “Honor your father and your mother, that your days may be long upon the land which the Lord your God is giving you.”

Ephesians 6:1-3 “Children, obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right.  “Honor your father and mother,” which is the first commandment with promise: ‘that it may be well with you and you may live long on the earth.’”

God is a parent/child kind of person. He is in complete support of the relationship between a child and their mother and father. After all, God is a Father and a Son! Remember? God the Father, God the Son, and God the Holy Spirit - three-in-one? If He is Father and Son, and we are made in His image, what should that say about our own relationships with our parents?

The first thing you should realize is that the fifth commandment doesn’t even mention obedience. It says to honor your father and mother. God is most interested in your attitude towards them. Honor goes much further than mere obedience - it deals with our heart. Honoring your parents means to respect them, to have a high regard for them, and to highly value them. This is the attitude God wants His people to have toward their parents.

Ephesians 6:1 tells christian children to obey their parents in the Lord. This means that as long as their parents aren’t telling them to disobey God’s Word, they should obey. Obedience to parents is required for as long as a child is under their authority. When a child grows up and leaves the home, the command to obey is no longer binding on them. But notice this, the command to honor has no age limit!

Even grown-ups are commanded by God to honor their father and mother. This attitude of respect and esteem should continue from childhood into adult years. Even after one’s parents have passed on, their memory should be honored and respected.

How important is this attitude of honor to God? Extremely! Even though it is the fifth commandment, it is the first to have a promise attached to it. The promise is this: “that it may go well with you and you may live long on the earth.” This is a concrete promise from God; if you honor your father and your mother, you will have a long, good life! Count on this: if things aren’t going so well for you - the first thing you should examine is your attitude and respect for your parents!

Now, this gets a little delicate in some situations. What if parents aren’t deserving of honor? What if a parent was abusive, neglectful, or hurtful? What should we do when we’re commanded to give something that isn’t deserved? All too often, adults are still struggling with what their parents did or didn’t do for them as a child. Even after the parents are dead and gone, those wounds can still fester. Surely God doesn’t expect honor in these situations, right?

Wrong. It is true that God’s command to obey our parents has a condition attached (“in the Lord”). But His command to honor our parents has no conditions on it. He told us to honor them, whether they deserve it or not. But when you think about it, this unconditional honor isn’t anything new. After all, God loved us when we didn’t deserve it - right? Doesn’t He command us to love each other - unconditionally? Even His command for us to forgive others has no strings attached to it. We’re just told to do it! So why would it be surprising for God to command honor towards parents, whether it’s deserved or not? You see, God is far more interested in our obedience from the heart than He is about whether someone deserves your honor (or love, or forgiveness).

So how do we honor a parent that doesn’t deserve it? You honor them by releasing the pain they’ve caused. You honor them by giving them the respect of a parent. You honor them by forgiving them of the wrongs they have done. You honor them by letting go of any hurt they may have caused. And you honor them by praying for them.

Of course it’s not easy. Not a single one of the ten commandments are easy. If we could do it on our own, then we wouldn’t have needed salvation! But, through the amazing, empowering grace of God we can receive the strength we need to obey this command from the heart.

El Shaddai

Genesis 17:1 “When Abram was ninety-nine years old, the Lord appeared to Abram and said to him, “I am Almighty God (El Shaddai); walk before Me and be blameless. 2 And I will make My covenant between Me and you, and will multiply you exceedingly.”

El Shaddai is another name or title of God. Like the other “El” names - El Shaddai is used to describe a specific characteristic or trait of God. In most English translations, this name is translated as God Almighty. This is a little unusual, considering the literal meaning. Shaddai literally means “many breasted”. This reference to the female body as a description of God must’ve made the translators a little nervous.

To be clear, God is NOT female! El Shaddai is not speaking of a lewd or pagan concept of God. Remember, the “El” names are descriptive of God’s nature. So what in God’s nature could “the many breasted God” be describing?

Let’s go back to Genesis 1:27. “So God created man in His own image; in the image of God He created him; male and female He created them.” God made man in His image, but that isn’t a reference to males. When we read that man was made in His image, it’s better said “mankind.” We know it’s referring to males and female because this verse says so! Both men and women were made in God’s image. God put part of His nature in the male and part in the female. Together, they were to reflect God’s entire nature. After God made mankind (male and female), He blessed them and gave them dominion over the earth (verse 28). Men and women were made to display God’s nature on the earth. This is why it has always been God’s will for children to have a mother and a father. Together they can relate God’s entire nature to that child.

When we realize this, we can understand that there is something in a mother’s nature that reflects God’s own nature. This is what the word shaddai pictures, the care that a nursing mother has for her child. So El Shaddai is the God Who cares for us.

El Shaddai is named many times in the book of Genesis, as God is dealing with the Patriarchs. Isn’t it interesting that God revealed Himself to these great fathers as Someone who cares like a mother?
Genesis 28:3 “May El Shaddai bless you, and make you fruitful and multiply you, that you may be an assembly of peoples”
Genesis 35:11 “Also God said to him: “I am El Shaddai. Be fruitful and multiply; a nation and a company of nations shall proceed from you, and kings shall come from your body.”

Although Isaiah doesn’t use the name El Shaddai, he clearly describes the care God has for His people. Isaiah 66:13 gives us a beautiful word picture: “As one whom his mother comforts, so I will comfort you; and you shall be comforted in Jerusalem.” The next time you see a mother comforting a child who hurt himself, you’re looking at a picture of how God comforts us in our own trouble!

Isaiah 49:15 “Can a woman forget her nursing child, and not have compassion on the son of her womb? Surely they may forget, yet I will not forget you.” Sadly, we have seen many mothers who have forgotten and forsaken their children. You see, a mother’s love isn’t perfect anymore - we live in a fallen world now. But no matter how your parents cared for you (good or bad), God’s tender care goes far beyond that! Psalm 27:10 says, “When my father and my mother forsake me, then Yahweh will take care of me.”

God cares for you. He’ll never leave you or abandon you (Hebrews 13:5). If you stay close to Him, He will bring you through whatever problem you’re in. Trust in the care of El Shaddai!

Psalm 91:1 “He who dwells in the secret place of the Most High (El Elyon) shall abide under the shadow of the Almighty (El Shaddai).”